Hello there.
There are many reasons you may be reading this. Perhaps you are a political 'slash fiction' obsessive and have Googled the phrase 'George Osborne Piss Bukkake'... terms which have brought people to this blog in the past, whereupon I cannot even begin to imagine the 'wilting' disappointment they experienced.
You may be a friend of mine, scanning my gibberings for 'cries for help' or other evidence of that cataclysmic breakdown that has been in the post for two decades. Don't worry, I am a 'Brinksman'... All the pleasure for me is derived from sailing close to the edge, giving every impression that I will fall at any moment, but, in reality I am never less than completely in control... The bouts of hysterical laughter/weeping/animal impressions are just theatrical tools I employ.
Maybe I tricked you into coming here, luring you from your preferred social network by attaching the link to a gag, or hashtag, that was just too damn enticing to pass up... In which case, sorry... the entries prior to this are much more entertaining... oh and can you click on the 'music links' dotted around this page... you don't even have to listen... you can mute them... I'll never ever know that*, but I will see the 'play' statistic one day and it will make me smile... think of it like charity... but free... and for someone who doesn't particularly deserve, or need it.
(*Unless of course you leave me a comment telling me... but at least I'd get a comment then... I keep hearing about a plague of 'Trolls'... they must be afeared of me)
You may even be a member of #TeamBozier...
Most likely you've got here through the 'Badly Drawn Roy' post... which still gets plenty of visitors every day. He seems to be doing ok, although I have had no further direct contact with him. I'm happy to have helped, although the people who contacted me about it seemed to massively over-estimate my involvement...
There is however a possibility that you are a recruiter, or an employer, who has Googled my name to see what that sewer of human behaviour, the internet, will vomit onto their desks when my name is uttered...
... and Luckily you've ended up here first, and not my 'George Osborne Many-Wee-Wonder-site'... (Which honestly doesn't exist... although it should... and if I had the erotic fiction skills I would make one... I mean, look how well 'Fifty Shades of Lame' is doing... now... 'Mild Squirm' fiction for girls... that's where the money is)
So hello to you... and whatever job you're searching me for, I can assure you I'll be very good at it... and of course much more hard-working than is apparent on this Blog.
I am however puzzled as to what you hope this little search will achieve? Really... I'm not complaining... far be it from me to deride your procedures Potential Future Boss... that would be stupid... but, has nobody ever told you: Nobody is completely themselves on the internet... because that is what the internet is for.
Some of my friends who read this blog have asked me about this: Am I worried about what I write on here, bearing in mind that you... yes 'you' are actually now reading it... (Oooh... how 'Meta'... if you are a recruiter reading this blog, drop me a clever comment... and then give me that job... whatever it is)
...and the answer to that is: 'of course not'... it's a mildly snarky opinion, music, social media and politics blog, it could never have any bearing whatsoever on my ability to do any job... it's fluff...
So those same friends ask: Well... what about your portrayal of yourself as an acerbic misanthrope who lives entirely in the realms of social media and the internet...
Well... in that case I have to entrust in the intelligence of the reader (You... Yes, your intelligence... high pressure I know) I imagine if you are able to use a search engine, you will be able to understand the difference between the real world and the 'let's pretend' world.
I mean, I bet at least half of you immediately started shaking your head when you saw that I used that awful, tawdry 'A friend asked me' device a few moments ago in a vain attempt at keeping this meander-wagon steered in the right direction... Of course I've never been asked these questions... anyone who asked them would be insane, and incapable of any human interaction... let alone 'Friendship'. As soon as those questions left their non existent lips, I'd punch them in their non-existent face... except of course I wouldn't because 'they' don't exist... and the 'me' that types this is an internet persona...
All clear?
So the queation remains: What can you really learn about someone from the internet?
The Answer: Well... nothing really... nothing of any use in the actual material, fleshbag world... Why? because the internet allows, nay encourages all of us to lie and exaggerate...
Someone I know says on Facebook (complete with imagex flitered to resemble a Polaroid shot): 'OMG Had The Awesomest Breakfast Ever!'
They didn't... it was fry up... just an unremarkable fry up without black pudding... a fact which no 'trendy' filter can disguise
Someone else says 'Big night last night... proper dead now'
Well they aren't are they? There's no way to Tweet from beyond the grave... (or is there? see previous post... whether this idea interests you or not, it's simply funnier than this one)
The internet is no better a source of important recruitment information than a horoscope... or the graffiti on a toilet door... or the ravings of the woman behind the bottle bins at Tesco who insists I am Roy Orbison...
On the other hand, this you can trust implicitly oh wise, witty and attractive recruiter person...
I'll be bloody great at that job...
Whatever it is...
...oh and I like Black pudding on a fry up...
Don't judge me...
There are many reasons you may be reading this. Perhaps you are a political 'slash fiction' obsessive and have Googled the phrase 'George Osborne Piss Bukkake'... terms which have brought people to this blog in the past, whereupon I cannot even begin to imagine the 'wilting' disappointment they experienced.
You may be a friend of mine, scanning my gibberings for 'cries for help' or other evidence of that cataclysmic breakdown that has been in the post for two decades. Don't worry, I am a 'Brinksman'... All the pleasure for me is derived from sailing close to the edge, giving every impression that I will fall at any moment, but, in reality I am never less than completely in control... The bouts of hysterical laughter/weeping/animal impressions are just theatrical tools I employ.
Maybe I tricked you into coming here, luring you from your preferred social network by attaching the link to a gag, or hashtag, that was just too damn enticing to pass up... In which case, sorry... the entries prior to this are much more entertaining... oh and can you click on the 'music links' dotted around this page... you don't even have to listen... you can mute them... I'll never ever know that*, but I will see the 'play' statistic one day and it will make me smile... think of it like charity... but free... and for someone who doesn't particularly deserve, or need it.
(*Unless of course you leave me a comment telling me... but at least I'd get a comment then... I keep hearing about a plague of 'Trolls'... they must be afeared of me)
You may even be a member of #TeamBozier...
Most likely you've got here through the 'Badly Drawn Roy' post... which still gets plenty of visitors every day. He seems to be doing ok, although I have had no further direct contact with him. I'm happy to have helped, although the people who contacted me about it seemed to massively over-estimate my involvement...
There is however a possibility that you are a recruiter, or an employer, who has Googled my name to see what that sewer of human behaviour, the internet, will vomit onto their desks when my name is uttered...
... and Luckily you've ended up here first, and not my 'George Osborne Many-Wee-Wonder-site'... (Which honestly doesn't exist... although it should... and if I had the erotic fiction skills I would make one... I mean, look how well 'Fifty Shades of Lame' is doing... now... 'Mild Squirm' fiction for girls... that's where the money is)
So hello to you... and whatever job you're searching me for, I can assure you I'll be very good at it... and of course much more hard-working than is apparent on this Blog.
I am however puzzled as to what you hope this little search will achieve? Really... I'm not complaining... far be it from me to deride your procedures Potential Future Boss... that would be stupid... but, has nobody ever told you: Nobody is completely themselves on the internet... because that is what the internet is for.
Some of my friends who read this blog have asked me about this: Am I worried about what I write on here, bearing in mind that you... yes 'you' are actually now reading it... (Oooh... how 'Meta'... if you are a recruiter reading this blog, drop me a clever comment... and then give me that job... whatever it is)
...and the answer to that is: 'of course not'... it's a mildly snarky opinion, music, social media and politics blog, it could never have any bearing whatsoever on my ability to do any job... it's fluff...
So those same friends ask: Well... what about your portrayal of yourself as an acerbic misanthrope who lives entirely in the realms of social media and the internet...
Well... in that case I have to entrust in the intelligence of the reader (You... Yes, your intelligence... high pressure I know) I imagine if you are able to use a search engine, you will be able to understand the difference between the real world and the 'let's pretend' world.
I mean, I bet at least half of you immediately started shaking your head when you saw that I used that awful, tawdry 'A friend asked me' device a few moments ago in a vain attempt at keeping this meander-wagon steered in the right direction... Of course I've never been asked these questions... anyone who asked them would be insane, and incapable of any human interaction... let alone 'Friendship'. As soon as those questions left their non existent lips, I'd punch them in their non-existent face... except of course I wouldn't because 'they' don't exist... and the 'me' that types this is an internet persona...
All clear?
So the queation remains: What can you really learn about someone from the internet?
The Answer: Well... nothing really... nothing of any use in the actual material, fleshbag world... Why? because the internet allows, nay encourages all of us to lie and exaggerate...
Someone I know says on Facebook (complete with imagex flitered to resemble a Polaroid shot): 'OMG Had The Awesomest Breakfast Ever!'
They didn't... it was fry up... just an unremarkable fry up without black pudding... a fact which no 'trendy' filter can disguise
Someone else says 'Big night last night... proper dead now'
Well they aren't are they? There's no way to Tweet from beyond the grave... (or is there? see previous post... whether this idea interests you or not, it's simply funnier than this one)
The internet is no better a source of important recruitment information than a horoscope... or the graffiti on a toilet door... or the ravings of the woman behind the bottle bins at Tesco who insists I am Roy Orbison...
On the other hand, this you can trust implicitly oh wise, witty and attractive recruiter person...
I'll be bloody great at that job...
Whatever it is...
...oh and I like Black pudding on a fry up...
Don't judge me...
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