Opinion: How did George O end up in the Pissy mud outside the tent?

Poor poor poor poor George O.

Now there's a sentence I never thought I'd type.... Or read... but there it sits, atop this Blog... and to be clear, I do NOT mean financially, despite him asserting that he is not in the 50p tax bracket... (A creative accountant perhaps, or maybe he gets paid entirely in 'credit' for various 'night-time entrepreneurs'... Maybe he works for the love of the country)

No, somehow our George O has gone from being the man 'inside the tent', directing his urine stream out (and straight into the staring, bovine faces of the various 'plebs' and 'oiks' that he sees making the unpalatable majority of the UK) to a spluttering blinking mess at the centre of some horrific, urine-based, bukkake-circle made up of seemingly, the entire press pack, left and right...

He has been lambasted by everyone this morning, and various permutations of 'Granny Tax' have been trending all night in response to his 2012 budget. The amazing budget that pleased precisely nobody. (I am excusing business's from this, as they aren't real people... No matter how much they, or the law, pretends they are... I'm also excluding any business leader who supports this budget, for pretty much the same reason)

How has that happened? How has it been allowed to happen. A Conservative who values his career doesn't allow himself to be the 'front cover donkey' for both the Sun and the Mail...

So... Poor Poor George.
(Unless of course he really does like S&M, in which case this is the ultimate humiliation, something a true aficionado might spend a fortune on, and could only be improved in the front page had featured him dressed as a baby girl, with frilly nappy and dummy in mouth... Sorry, no mind bleach available for that image... It is yours... Enjoy)

So where is his boss in this?

Laughing probably. He is currently the Teflon Knight. Student fees? Clegg took that grenade. NHS? Wheel out the tattered remains of Clegg for the major offensive, then mop up any spare salvos with Lansley and poor ol' Shirley Williams...

So... George... Do you see a pattern? Who are the silvertops going to lynch? It won't be D-Cam... He's hiding behind the curtain, Oz the great and powerful style. You're the one appearing in caricature on all the front pages, looking furtive and sneaky, with one hand in a pensioners pocket.

And don't forget, some of them learned to shoot weapons in a 'massive-fuck-off-war' (excuse the technical term there)

Maybe George should get some insurance in place for any briefings that are being prepared as we speak... Do governments ever use the 'One rogue MP.' excuse? Either way... George... Get some damaging leaks on others out there... Go on... If you're in the game, play it dirty... You'll look good with bloodied knuckles... Maybe that Risk Register? I'll give you my email address if you like...

Incidentally, I KNOW this has very little about the budget in it. People who know more are speculating enough. Let them do the 'projected' (read: imaginary and wildly open to interpretation) numbers...

I also know that the Sun and the Mail are taking 'point' on this one...
Fair play... Still don't like them... Or any newspaper.
enemy's enemy ain't no friend of me...

Opinion: Not a Supporter of NHS Reforms? You MUST want to Kiss Trotsky on His Dead Mouth.

Who wants to be a Trotskyist, or a Trotskyite... Or whatever you call anyone who follows the example of Lev Davidovich Bronshtein?

Nobody?

What.. none of you?

Well... Chances are, if you have any critical words to say about Andrew 'Benny Hill' Lansley's NHS Reforms then you are a Trotskyismer... Or a 'Trot' as is the preferred dismissive terminology.

Ok... Well let's look at Mr Trotsky. He was a Marxist, He was a founder and Commander of the Red Army, He opposed Stalin's pact with Hitler and was subsequently assassinated by him in 1940, having been expelled from the Communist party and Exiled.

He dies 6 years before the establishment of our NHS. As far as I can see he makes no comment on it... or on anything of it's kind. No 'Trotskyism' appears to be more concerned with the act of revolution, and the establishment of a 'Working Class' led society. It is about Means of production, land ownership and all that exciting 'Commie' stuff. No mention of a provision of Universal Healthcare.

Would he have approved?

Maybe.. Maybe not... He probably wouldn't have liked our system, based as it is on a centralised power structure, with an 'Elite' sitting atop it, making the decisions. No he probably would have preferred the decision making to be deferred to more localised 'Cells'... Or not.. I mean.. The guy's been dead for more than 60 Years... He never saw a health service in action...

Why should he have had any opinion on it at all?

Ok.. Confession time. I didn't know any of this. I looked it up. I didn't know much about Trotsky before a few days ago, having been called a Troskyist/ite/ismer by someone for daring to say that Lansley looked like a fool running around a hospital, being heckled and then releasing the 4 most Staged looking pictures you'll see this side of a North Korean Dictator's Funeral.

Being that my only real understanding of 'Marxism' was from a literary criticism standpoint (Thanks Manchester Met Uni) I decided to look up what this 'Insult' meant in the context of the NHS. And what did I find?

It means nothing.. It's meaningless... A way of Screaming 'LEFTY' at any criticism and thus shutting it down:
"If you don't 100% support Lansley you are a Lefty Marxist, who probably looks and thinks like Rik from 'The Young Ones' and wants to find Trotsky's grave, disinter him at midnight and French Kiss his dead mouth and maybe feel his Bottom... No.. Probably feel his Bottom.. No Definitely"

Aside from being a 'Non-Debate' this is also less and less plausible... It's not just 'Lefties' who are starting to grumble about this... and it's not just 'Lefties' who are concerned with the way this is being bludgeoned through with very little support, and it's not just 'Lefties' who think that a bill with so many amendments is clearly unfit for purpose.

So.. a rethink is in order... and maybe actually 'listening' to people with opposing viewpoints instead of just plucking a historical figure from Marxism and applying his name to them.

If you don't do that and in fact you just want to forge ahead with your own ideas based on a series of shadowy consultations and staged/managed meetings... well.. In that case I'd say that you definitely Love Stalin... In fact you probably want to kiss him right on his dead mouth.... and probably feel his Bottom.
No.. Definitely...


(Ps.. Thanks to any of the people I've linked to... I don't really know the etiquette here.. but if you want any links removed, let me know... Oh.. and any Rabid Trotskyismerationers who know more about him, and disagree with my Wiki-Lite Research, let me know and I will correct where appropriate... Isn't Democracy lovely?)

Haunted Forest Extra Tracks

Been a long time working on an essay-style post on evolution and leaders. In the meantime, here are three tracks that I recorded for 'Haunted Forest' and decided not to include for pacing. Hope you enjoy.

A Bot's Introduction to Ann Leslie

I've just had a sudden, and vaguely alarming revelation.


It starts, as vaguely alarming revelations often do, whilst up far too late at night perusing the Twitter Timeline for BBC Question time (For some Reason). The words 'Ann Leslie' were trending for the reason that a humanoid called 'Ann Leslie' was on the program tonight and appeared to many people to be rather amusingly tipsy, although having not watched the show, I have literally no idea about that. She also managed to anger/delight quite a few people, with some points which I also didn't see. Because I didn't watch it. As I hope I made clear.


I had thought about watching it on iplayer,


Luckily I didn't pursue this, because as time went on and more and more humans has abandoned Twitter the Trend began to be invaded by more and more 'Bots' who kept the trend alive for hours after the program.


Now I am utterly clueless about 'Bots', or what purpose they serve. Bots seem to me to be computer generated word smashing machines. They often seem to feature, possibly stolen, images of women. What this expected to achieve, I have no idea, as they don't appear to actually do anything. They just seem to ride around on trends like pouty surfers. Very rarely they'll offer you some link in nonsensical english that you'll never click on. Some are fairly targeted, like a 'Robocop' Bot that replies: 'I'd buy that for a dollar'... For some Reason.


So the people had gone to bed. And the Bots took over. Here are some examples of what they came up with:

My infallible acquaintance skirts the chemist's gender. Ann Leslie

The catalog steams above whatever rack! Ann Leslie

The nun overwhelms the authentic criminal around a museum. AnnLeslie

Should the moral nun predict her magazine? Ann Leslie

Your wizard laughs under the cyclist. Ann Leslie

His sickening pad chambers the premium juvenile. Ann Leslie

The embedded author rests past the incident. Ann Leslie

How can the ineffective lamp spike the vowel? Ann Leslie

When can the torture count beneath the disturbed elitist? Ann Leslie

Leaving it untouched, save arranging it into the vaguest couplets and setting the text a-cock with that natty slant I'm pretty sure that I could get away with passing that off as poetry. If I used a breathy poetry voice and included plenty of pauses I could possibly even make it sound like one. The repeated 'Ann Leslie' at the end of each line would be particularly effective in this context. 

So the 'vaguely alarming revelation' is that a series of seemingly thrown together, utterly meaningless words has managed to interest me far more than hearing the words of a living breathing person, whilst also managing to amuse me to the extent that I now never ever want to see anything of this woman in case it ruins the fantastical impression of her that these words portray. 

I'm sure I'm in some way missing out by not seeking out the words and wisdom of the woman concerned, but I just fear that it won't live up to the Bots Introduction.